When I was a little kid, I loathed those boys who liked girls only because they were pretty. I suppose that came mostly from the fact that no boy thought I was pretty enough to like.
Nearly 30 years later, I’ve formed a pretty reasonable understanding for beauty. And a lot of it comes, yes, from the inside, but also due to how you feel about your outside. Your perception of beauty and aesthetics is pretty inevitable and how that makes you feel is as unique as the person you’ve become.
I say all this because the Cosmo Bikini Bash would have been something that, as a young girl, I would have been against with every fiber of my being. But it is really all about how you feel about your body. There were supposed to be a thousand bikini-clad women and what I saw were women of all shapes and sizes. It was refreshing to know that a beauty magazine celebrated this diversity. Or, at least, I’d like to think so.
There were women with rolls and muffin tops. Others who wore a skirt and a bikini top. And still others who had the height and air of models but as soon as the sundress came off, you sort of wish they had left it on.
And as the Cosmo animation team (which consisted of very buff men who knew they were eye candy) strutted about, I wondered about the woman who had the botched breast implants. I know it was botched and plain overenthusiasm because each individual breast was so big that the skin on her chest wasn’t large enough. So instead of the skin in between being flush with her sternum, it made a low-lying hammock. One quick look was enough to make me wonder what fucked up thing had someone said to her to make her think massaging her breasts in front of her man (who was clearly looking at some other woman) in public was kosher.
And why was she perpetuating the cycle?
So it reminded me that you’ve always got to be thankful and as Katt Williams once said something to the effect of, “Ladies, you’ve got to be the shit to you…. You’ve got to ask yourself why you’re attracting ‘ain’t shit n****z’. It might be ‘ain’t shit pussy’.”