Gym Rats: The Pole Dancer and the Trolling Wannabe Rat Girls

Ever since I read Konrad Lorenz’ “King Solomon’s Ring”, I’ve become more aware of human behavior. I just find it fascinating to see how people interact and the application (or lack thereof) of social mores.

There is a guy in the gym of whom I won’t post photos of out of respect. He has this routine which sometimes involves bench presses and salsa classes. Not wholly unusual. There are two exercises from his repertoire, however, that I’d like to point out and are as follows:

Exercise #1: Stand in front of a post on one of the taller machines. Bend briskly at the knees and with both hands, grab the pole. Do a set of ten. Then stretch your quads on the weight posts of the leg press machine. Repeat.

Exercise #2: Bend at the hip with hands on thighs. Inhale deeply, bringing in your buttocks as far forward as possible without losing your bent position. Do this preferably in a mirror and watch yourself head-on.

Can I just say that Exercise #2 seemed to be something to be performed at a rectal exam?

The funny thing is that when he finishes, he acts as if he’s done a full-on work out, wiping the sweat off his brow and everything.

Then there are the trolling wannabe rat girls. I’ve got to admit, I would have been one in high school.

If I had no self-esteem.

And it was a hearkening back to those days as I saw a local university chick come in wearing a t-shirt that came up to her waist. She walked right up to the mirror and lifted up her shirt, just so that she, and anyone else nearby, could look at her abs. She then proceeds to talk to one of the regulars in a coy “you’re sooo good-looking” manner with the complementary light slap on his arm, as if she were cross. In attack mode, she goes to the chin-up bar which was directly in front of the mirror and jumps up. The shirt that was waist-long was now breast-high as she started bringing her knees up as far as they would go.

It made me laugh. Two completely different people who are completely oblivious, both doing the same thing: trying to look good. And perhaps failing miserably.

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